Dominic Mercurio | He Won't Belong / 2023

the turning point

by Douglas Messerli

 

Dominic Mercurio (screenwriter and director) He Won't Belong / 2023 [22 minutes]

 

North of San Francisco, on the strip of the desolate California coast which is often described as the “lost coast,” Theo (Joel DeCandio) driving on a rainy night on an almost empty road discovers

a young hitchhiker, Connor (Cole Doman), wet and shivering in the cold.

    The young man immediately gets into his van, the stranger immediately taking him back to his lovely house, providing him something warm to drink and a chance to warm up by the fire place before telling him there is a guest room with an already made-up bed for him to stay the night.

 

    In most gay films this hint at the beginning of a sexual encounter or serve the prologue to a night of horror, but here it represents nothing more than kindness. The next morning, after a difficult night for guest, the homeowner Theo offers him up some toast, jam, and coffee.

     Politely, Theo attempts to query his guest about the reason why he was out hitchhiking in the rain without even a bag or backpack, obviously with only the clothes on his back. But all he can discover is that back in San Francisco Connor had a boyfriend.

 

     We get glimpses of that boyfriend, a black, slightly older man named Simon (Seven James) who never speaks in the film but just by his very presence poses as a kind indiscernible threat for Connor. At one point, as the boyfriend stands naked before him in a dream, Connor pushes his finger into Simon’s navel resulting in blood leaking down his leg and onto the younger boy’s foot.

      The viewer can only presume that the two were having difficulties in their relationship. Perhaps the title of this film hints at a sense of discomfort. But we have no way of knowing whether is it Simon or Connor who doesn’t belong in the other’s world?

       Although Connor seems anxious to move on, Theo coaxes him to go searching for chanterelles with him, as once more he attempts to discern where Connor is heading and why? All the young man can seem to suggest is that he is going north, perhaps as far as Canada—although soon after speaking that word, he suggests he just been joking, that he’s not heading that far.

     Theo offers him home-cooked pasta with the mushrooms, and Connor stays on, discovering in a drawer near to the silverware and napkins he’s been asked to fetch, pictures of Theo and another man.

      When asked about the picture, Theo explains that he was his husband who recently died. He briefly recounts that they moved to the beautiful oceanside house from the city, buying it together. At first his friend didn’t feel he could survive apart from city life, but soon found that they had made the right decision. But one night he became ill and before a doctor could even determine what his illness was, he died. Without his husband, Theo says that he will soon have to give up the house since he cannot afford it alone.

    Connor is still convinced that he should be on his way, but suffers another spell of stomach spasms and stays one more night.

 

      Theo takes him to a special place that he and his husband used to go, overlooking the ocean, where finally Connor opens up a little, expressing his fears that since his boyfriend is so quiet and at times impenetrable, he fears that their relationship won’t last. Perhaps he is better off alone, he argues, that he’s better off learning to survive by himself than remaining in a relationship that seems so tenuous.

       Theo attempts to assure him that all love is unsure and seemingly impermanent. When Connor asks him how Theo knew that his husband was the one for him, he simply answers: “I couldn’t get him out of my head.”

       Soon after, Theo drops his guest back off on the road where he found him, the two quickly hugging goodbye.

      We see Connor standing on the right side of the road, heading north away from San Francisco. No car passes. It’s a lonely road.

      A few minutes later, Connor walks across to the other side of the road and begins walking back in the direction of San Francisco. Obviously, he is now willing to return to Simon and take a chance with love.

      The power of this short film exists in its indirectness and indeterminacy. There is no plot, no sudden incident when the two strangers discover themselves falling in love. Both instead are isolated beings, one who has painfully lost his love, the other who, fearful of losing love, is about to give it up. But the fact that Theo has had something so beautiful precious, helps the younger Connor to realize that he should at least give love a chance by returning, transforming his sense of not belonging into a statement of not “being long” gone, as in “he won’t be long.”

 

Los Angeles, May 14, 2024

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (May 2024).