about last night
by Douglas Messerli
Alice Oseman
(screenplay), Euros Lyn (director) Heartstopper “Secret” /
2022 [30 minutes] [Season 1, Episode 4]
Episode 4 picks up
immediate with Nick’s very wet reentry in Charlie’s heart. How could you not
love someone who had run to your door through a rain storm to tell you how much
he truly loves you—especially when, in your bedroom he finally kisses you full
on and admits that he’s sorry about last night, given that he was going through
a “full gay crisis.” Nick admits he may need some time to figure everything
out.
Surely at that age, 16, I might have needed more than “a little” time to come to terms with a world in which previously I’d never imagined myself. And the inevitable question hovers over their relationship, Nick wondering whether or not at school they can….Charlie finishes his sentence, “Keep this a secret.” As hundreds of such coming out gay films have revealed, secrets are difficult in a world of quick-minded peers who want to get to know everything about their fellow students in a manner that might remind one of the newspaper paparazzi.
And surely even that secret will be
difficult when your lover, Charlie, chases you down that wet British street to
kiss you goodbye.
We can almost guess the results. Even the
very next day Imogen has recognized that there is something “different” about
her “boyfriend.” It must be his hair, she declares.
In fact, as Charlie returns to his
classroom seat the next morning beside his now lover, there is a remarkable
change on both their faces, as Charlie’s “Hi” is reflected in Nick’s now
equally infectious smile. Anyone with a careful eye can see these two
individuals are joyfully happy sharing the same space.
Meanwhile, in the neighboring girl’s
school Tara openly kisses Darcy in front of Elle, who wonders if she is now
officially “the third wheel.”
Something has definitely changed since
that dreadful night-time party at Harry Greene’s mansion.
Both
Charlie and Nick now escape to Mr Ajayi’s art room, to where Charlie escaped during
the previous year’s bullying. Nick is truly a changed man, admitting that he’s basically
happy to have abandoned all of his own friends who spent their time at lunch “chucking
stuff” at people. But Nick also notes that Ajayi was giving him an “evil eye,”
which Charlie explains was probably a result of the teacher confusing him with Ben,
who wanted to keep everything a secret—which suddenly makes him realize that he
has once more entered into the thicket of what secrecy is all about, the lies,
the confusion, the possible isolation…whatever. Charlie tries to make it clear
that this time there is a big difference, but even Nick perceives the problem.
And meanwhile, Charlie’s having difficulty
with his tackling on the rugby field. Fortunately, the female coach (Chetna
Pandya) tries to give him some advice about gay boys who were also treat in
sports.
And meanwhile…the plot gets thicker as the
gossip about Tara and Darcy’s dancing kisses spreads like wildfire through
their girl’s academy. What does a “secret” in such a world mean? And, of course,
once the serpent-figure Imogen demands to know the truth about Tara and Darcy’s
relationship, she insists that Nick Nelson and she are a couple, which
obviously disturbs Charlie’s friend Elle. Elle declares herself as a lesbian, a
very problematic statement since we know she is transgender and Tao is
obviously in love with her.
Things are growing more difficult in
Truham Grammar School as well when come of Nick’s friends lob a football at
Tao, who refuses to return it to Nick, instead tossing it back to hit his head
as Charlie’s lover walks off. In school all is love and war, war mostly.
What might happen also, Nick must fear,
when Charlie announces all his friends—Toa, Isaac, and Elle—are showing up to
watch him play rugby. He assures Nick that they won’t say anything, but secrecy
is obviously becoming an increasingly difficult proposition. And when Darcy and
Tara also show up, Darcy hinting that Charlie and Nick look “awfully coup-ley,”
Nick finally begins to perceive just how impossible secrecy is. “We’re totally
platonic. Good friends,” the truly honest Charlie lies.
In a sense, the totally “out” world which
Charlie and Nick inhabit is far more difficult to negotiate than the utterly
hidden world of my long-before era. Do these kids even have a change to protect
themselves for a few moments from what others might soon define them as?
The Truham competitors, St. John’s have a
14-point advantage against Truham’s 0, as rain begins to fall. St. John’s team
seem to be made up of adult rugby players, as opposed to Truham’s boys.
Things get worse as the score turns to a
35-point advantage, no one, particularly Charlie’s friend being able to
describe the mysterious rules of rugby. Charlie finally attempts a tackle, but
is hit hard by a St. John’s player, and is carried off the field, the game
called for heavy rain.
But it temporarily alters Nick’s breakthrough
realization, returning secrecy to it’s necessary, if totally ineffectual,
place. Even worse, he’s met with Imogen, who in front of his teammates wonders
whether or not he might want to go out on a “date.” What’s a bi-boy, confused
about everything, supposed to say. But his agreement, witnessed by the literally
“overlooking” Tao and Tara, seals their conviction about how dangerous Nick is
for their beloved friend Charlie.
If you haven’t yet guessed, I’m sold on
this soap-opera.
Los Angeles, October 21,
2024
Reprinted from My
Queer Cinema blog (October 2024).