Denis Theriault | I Am Syd Stone / 2020 (Web series)

joining the human race

by Douglas Messerli

 

Denis Theriault (screenwriter and director) I Am Syd Stone / 2020 (Web series)

 

In 2019, as I mention above, director Denis Theriault, expanded his short 10-minute film I describe above into a web series with the same name. There were 6 episodes shown with the first and only season of the series, the first of them represented simply as a “Pilot,” which led some inattentive viewers such as the contributor to the Wikipedia discussion of this work to presume that that work was the same as the 2014 film. In fact, they were vastly different, with only the central character being retained, and even the actor in the original short Gharrett Patrick Paon being replaced by another actor, Travis Nelson.

  

   In the series, although Syd is visiting a smaller Canadian city, it does not at all appear to be the same hometown that Syd returned to as a movie star in the short 2014 film, and there are no old classmates to remind him of his own failures or his sexual indiscretions in the past such as those with his former friend Paul. But it is clear that the same-sex attraction that Syd was finally ready to embrace with Paul has now become a significant pull in his life and a threat to both his marriage and, more importantly perhaps, to his career. So distraught is he by his gay desires that it appears that appears that he has been even flagellating or torturing his own body to keep himself in check. In any event, as we quickly see it has done no good, and being alone in what appears to be the isolated city of Halifax merely encourages his homosexual urges.

 

 

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Episode 1: Pilot

 

Like all the following segments, this episode begins with a small scene of the “hero” as a child, playing with his father and mother, evidently based on real home movie clips of the director, Denis Theriault and his parents.

      Syd is having breakfast in the hotel restaurant when a woman, obviously a fan, approaches him furtively to ask for a selfie picture with the movie star. He readily agrees, a vast difference from the later times when requested autographs or snapshots are taken without his permission.

      While waiting in the van which takes the actors to the film location, Syn meets the young actor who he’s be playing against in this obviously low grade made for TV film, Soccer Dad. The boy Jake (Cameron Arason) on this particular morning seems chipper and ready for the shoot, sitting with his gruff manager-father, Nathan (Kevin Kincaid). The two of them, Syd and the boy, seem to get on well immediately, the older actor attempting to alleviate any fears the young boy may have about his role. Yet something seems wrong with the boy, who appears awkward and ill-at-ease in the role about which his father keeps bragging.

       Syd’s phone is already ringing when he returns back to his room, his agent insisting that he read a new manuscript she has forwarded him. It’s not an Indie, as she previously suggested but will now be produced by Universal. But Syd is not at all impressed by what he reads of the script and tells his agent to make it clear that he’s not interested. The name on the cover page is evidently a two-time Oscar winner, but he doesn’t care, he angrily declares. He simply didn’t connect with it. Even when she tells him that the screenwriter wrote it with him in mind and that it’s a “straight-up offer.” Knowing that he probably never even finished it, she suggests he take a couple of days and read it. But he’s adamant that he’s simply not interested, and growing angrier with his agent’s insistence, particularly, when she adds, the it’s worth considering “given the shit he’s currently doing,” which not only forces him to hang up but sends  him straight to the hotel bar.

 

     We already know from the short film that Syn is a former alcoholic, and we see him beginning yet again to drink heavily even in this “Pilot” episode. He turns around only to see a couple talking about him, obviously the way all movie stars feel in public, as if they’re being watched at every moment.  

    A young black man, Matt (Benjamin Charles Watson) asks the bartender if there’s any way he can get something to eat, but he’s told the kitchen closed five hours ago, and all she has is mixed nuts and pretzels. Syd suggests he get a screwdriver since it has two food groups, oranges and barley (wheat), advice which amuses Matt but since he’s had nothing to eat all day; and clearly doesn’t solve the problem.

    Matt retires to his nearby computer, and Syd shows up with a screwdriver for him, and one for himself. They toast, and within minutes he discovers that Matt is a defense attorney working on a big murder case (of which he can say nothing) that begins in the morning. Syd soon discovers that Matt is such a hard worker that he doesn’t even know who he is and has apparently never seen any movie that Syd might have been in. Delighted by that fact, Syd pretends to be a crew member.   

   Before the evening is out the two become sexually interested in one another, retreating to the seemingly empty hotel pool, where Matt admits that he pretty much works and sleeps, no time for play. But he also asks Syd, imagining him on the “sidelines” of the film industry, a question he has probably never before been asked: “What’s the dream.” Everyone, including Syd might presume he is living a dream, but perhaps Matt’s question might lead him to wonder whether, in fact, he has found what he truly desires.

    In any event, Syd can’t answer, but Matt perhaps answers for him as he suddenly grabs him for a kiss, the two falling into a deep embrace of lust—only to be interrupted by a late-night couple of intruders, the wife of whom demands a picture with the movie star. Even after Syd responds, “Not tonight,” tense on account of both the possibly being seen kissing another man and his own lapse into gay sexuality. She insists, her husband egging Syd on to let her get her picture. When she snaps a photo anyway, Syd grabs her cellphone and throws it into the pool, her husband angrily chasing after him as the actor attempts to make a getaway.

     Back in his room, his own cellphone goes off again. He takes it out and throws it across the room. A long shower follows, one of many Syd will take out of frustration and in an attempt to wipe out the desires that are stoking within.

 

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Episode 2: Catalyst

 

On the set the next day, the young child star is not at all proving to be a young star athlete, his father assuring everyone that he’ll straighten the problem out as he insists the child actor also quickly become a credible soccer player. After the conversation with his father, Jake is obviously frightened and frustrated, walking in a fake lockstep march back to the set.

    Clearly from his own childhood experiences, Syd can observe that the child is being manipulated to behave in a manner which is not natural to him, and that he has come to seriously resent his own father.

     Meanwhile, back in his room, he has six messages from his angry agent Geri, to which he still refuses to respond. Again, we see him drinking heavily. Back down at hotel bar, he discovers he has a good friend in the bartender, who has told off a reporter seeking information on the actor’s drinking habits and behavior.

     Returning to his room, everything seems to change for the better when he discovers Matt knocking on his door. Within moments he has lured his last-night fiasco of a would-be date into his room, apologizing for his behavior, and after a long discussion of his true hometown roots, admits who he really is—although, of course, for the non-moviegoer Matt his stardom still means little. But even Matt has seen “the guy with the hat” in Dino-Danger, Syd’s biggest hit, unintentionally, summarizing Syd’s career: “You were a big deal…well, you were.” Matt admits that sometimes he says the “dumbest stuff,” and apologizes for the comment.

    Before long, however, Matt has managed to find out that actually Syd has only been sexually involved with only one another male, the summer before his senior year (obviously Paul of the short film). As they are clearly about to engage in sex, Syd gets temporary cold feet and hurries off to the bathroom to engage in some more self-hate before finally facing Matt again, both of them now saying inside what they don’t truly mean, finding excuses for not remaining together, while in reality taking off their clothes and getting down to serious business. Matt notices Syd’s scars wonderingly, but says nothing as he engages in fellatio, Syd soon after fucking him. Another long shower filled with guilt and self-remonstrance follows.

 

 

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Episode 3: Shell-Shocked

 

When Matt awakens in Syd’s bed the next morning, he discovers Syd already dressed and packing for the day, clearly pushing Matt vacate the room as soon as possible. It’s clear that Syd, despite the enjoyment of the sex and the attraction he feels for Matt, is also suffering the full consequences of guilt.

     Matt asks if he can get Syd’s phone number, but Syd reports that he smashed his phone the other night. (We know that despite the fact he’s stashed it in a drawer, it still functions). Matt argues that Syd can’t just fuck him and leave, and observing the man naked, he turns back and gives him a deep kiss.

    But it doesn’t take Matt long, once Syd has gone off, in checking his “dead” phone to discover that, in fact, Syd is apparently in a heterosexual relationship. Moreover, when the maid intrudes upon the room, quickly retreating, he discovers the manuscript that Syd has tossed into the trash, sitting down to thoroughly read it.

     Downstairs, meanwhile, chaos looms as Syd discovers his girlfriend Rachel (Daiva Johnston) in the lobby. Having taken several planes just to get there in order to find out why he hasn’t been answering his phone, now that she’s found him in good condition, she’s explains she’s exhausted and simply wants to get some sleep. But, of course, Syd must suddenly find a way of preventing her from entering his room to discover Matt in his bed.

     He has breakfast with her, and convinces her that she should join him on the shoot, since she, also an actress, has a friend in one of the film assistants. Rachel refuses, but at the last moment joins him in the van to the studio.

     But he even cannot resist asking what she’s doing “here,” having come this long distance just to check up on him. She wonders if she shouldn’t just turn around at leave, but obviously suspects something is up.

     Taking a smoking break with Nathan, moreover, Syd asks if Jake is doing okay. When Syd suggests they should have hired him a stunt double, Jake’s father argues that he should have trained harder. When Syd suggests he’s an actor not athlete, the father argues, “What, he can’t be both?” Syd’s perceptive question, “Does he want to be?” brings an angry response from Nathan, “So why don’t you stick to “make believe,” and let me do the parenting, huh?”

     It’s clearly not been a good day for our dinosaur star.

 

 

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Episode 4: Catch and Release

 

The most dramatic of the series episodes, in “Catch and Release” Syd, at first, seems to have resolved the potential disaster. By the time he and Rachel return by to his room, he’s ready for yet another shower, imagining his sexual encounter all over again with Matt. By the time she knocks on the bathroom door, however, he’s gotten himself together again. She’s made reservations downstairs for dinner.

     Afraid of running into Matt, Syd suggests they just do room service, an idea which she’s more than happy to go along with. He apologizes to yet another individual, asking Rachel’s forgiveness for his seemingly cold response to her arrival. But apologies, we are soon to discover in this film, are not ever enough, since they also cover up lies.

     No sooner do they kiss and make-up, but Rachel, going down the hall for ice, discovers Matt knocking at their door. She suggests he must have the wrong room. But Matt can’t resist, calling her by name: “It’s Rachel.”

     When Syd comes out of the shower, suggesting they order nachos, Rachel is already making drinks. When she mentions Matt, however, and explains that he was just at the door, Syd, dressed only in a hotel towel, goes running after him, finding him just before the elevator doors close, Matt commenting: “She’s a lot prettier in person,” before heading off into the world, perhaps never to see Syd again.

      Clearly, when Syd returns to the room he has some explaining to do. From a nearby trash can, he pulls out several typewritten pages, returning to the room to explain that Matt’s a production assistant who’s brought some revisions. Syd slips them into his trusty bed bureau drawer, the one from which Matt has previously pulled out his phone to discover the truth about his friend.

 

     As Syd begins to dress, Rachel also opens the Pandora’s Box of Syd’s room to discover that the “line revisions” are simply lists and notes from some business meeting. “There’s something you’re not telling me,” she pleads. Everything has been “off” since I got here.

      “Who was that guy?”

      Syd admits that he’s a lawyer, she wondering is he in trouble. “No, we met the other night at the bar.”

     “Did you have plans tonight?” she asks.

      “No. Honestly I think he has a thing for me.”

      She realizes, however, that he’s lying. “Why’d you run after him like that?

      And a moment later, she adds “What are you not telling me?

      Finally he admits part of the story, that Matt was in the hallway, waiting for him. Syd even confesses, “I let him in.”

      “What do you mean, you let him in?

      “You know what I mean.”

      Almost unable to speak, she grasps at straws, “Okay, is this a one time thing, or are you gay….?

      “I don’t know,” Syd responds, repeating those words in near horror, yet speaking for the first time in utter honesty.

      “Do you love me?

      “Of course I do.”

      “Are you in love with me?

      As tears role down her eyes, Syd can’t answer.

      He reminds her of the ten-year reunion. “It was just a kiss. It meant nothing, nothing okay?”

      “Right. Yeah,” she sarcastically answers as she moves away from him.

      The evening ends with her immediately packing up and leaving, despite his pleas for her just to stay the night.

       Syd has lost his trophy and now knows that he may lose even the right to continue to compete, that his career is on the line.

 

*

 

Episode 5: History Repeated

 

If the previous episode was the most dramatic, Episode 5 is just what we might expect, as Syd, now without Matt and Rachel, has no where to go except to the bottle.

    It begins with his reading of the banal lines he’s been given to recite in his role. He storms off the set telling the director what he thinks of the script by throwing a soccer ball at the table set up for the actor’s water and sweet treats. A few moments later, while dining in the commissary on yoghurt he is joined by Nathan, who apologizes—in yet another apology not truly meant—for snapping at him about his son the other day.

     Syd sloughs it off.

     But Nathan continues, suggesting that kids are so coddled these days, “I was just trying to rough him up a little bit and make him tougher.

     Syd insists that he needn’t explain himself to him.

     “To be honest, you know, I’m kind of worried that he may be a late bloomer.”

     “What do you mean,” Syd prods.

     “You know man, like….”

     “Sorry, I don’t”

     “How old were you when you had your first girl friend?’

     “He’s eight.”

     “Ya, but when I was his age I was crazy about girls. That was all I ever thought about. You can’t tell me you weren’t Casanova back in the day.”

     Syd is silent for a moment or two. “I guess I was a late bloomer then too.’

     “Middle school. High school. Those are the prime years. What the fuck was wrong with you.”

     “You know, it’s funny. Because that’s exactly what my dad asked me. Yeah, right after he caught me having sex in the tool shed.”

     Nathan provides a hearty guffaw. “…..What was her name, man?…Tell me.

     “Brent.”

     “What?

     Syd pauses and leans forward. “His name was Brent.”

     Nathan stares forward.

     “You know, whenever he would get angry or stressed he had this vein in his forehead that would just pop right out.”

     “I think I forgot some ketchup,” Nathan answers, beginning to get up.

     Syd tosses a couple of ketchup packages upon his plate.

 

     Syd goes on to tell how he was sent to what basically was a conversion camp by his father.

     Nathan tries to interrupt, suggesting he has nothing against all of this, but Syd goes on with his story, explaining that his mother had died when he was six, so his father was all that he had left. The camp said it was going to mold him into something his father would be proud of. And that if he went along with it, everything would return to what it was before.  Accordingly, he went along with their attempt to convert him to a time before his sexual transgressions. Syd adds that he hasn’t talked to his dad in 14 years.

     The actor clearly leaves something for Nathan to think about with regard to his treatment of Jake. But whether or not he can comprehend Syd’s lessons we cannot tell.   

     But the memories and recent events have clearly been too much for the actor. Even his friendly hotel bartender worries if everything is okay.

     Syd asks her if she might happen to know in what room the lawyer he was talking to is staying. She doesn’t know but suggests he look behind him, where Matt is seated, again at his computer.

 

     He approaches Matt head bowed, tears in his eyes, but still cannot admit his love. Matt asks “Where did those scars come from?” and we now realize that perhaps they were not self-inflicted after all, but perhaps the result of punishment from either his father or the leaders of the conversion camp.

     Matt, moreover, now tells his own childhood history, about how his poor family had somehow acquired a computer which every one of his four siblings and his mother shared. He would look quickly at gay porno whenever he got a chance. But one day, when they all were out, he had his chance to really explore the porno sight and, having finished, went to get some tissues. Two minutes later, when he returned his mother was standing in front of the computer, her purse held tightly against her side. She didn’t say anything, but the next day the computer was gone.

      Matt explains that he’s returning home. Because of jury misconduct they have delayed the trial for a couple of months and they must now regroup and start all over again.

      Now Syd realizes he has truly lost his new lover and previous one both, and has no one left to turn to anymore. He tries once again to apologize, but this time it doesn’t work. Matt answers: “Don’t be sorry, be different.”

      For the next five minutes of this film, Syd spins off into an alcoholic coma, even his bartender friend refusing to serve him. After drinking up all the single servings of alcohol in his room, he passes out on the floor, vomit pouring from his mouth.

      When he finally awakens the next morning and regains sobriety, he opens the magic drawer, this time to find the previously tossed away manuscript with a note from Matt attached: “I would watch the Hell out of this!” The episode ends with Syd finally reading the screenplay in full.

 

 

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Episode 6: Tell-all

 

Fifteen months later the industry is all abuzz with the fact that the seeming has-been Syd Stone, is about to open in a searching expose of the rent-boy scene in Las Vegas as Mikey Starling in Wild Boy, obviously the manuscript Matt encouraged him to read. We also now comprehend, given its subject matter, why Syd had so vehemently rejected the very idea of his playing such a role.

     As this episode begins Syd is readying for a TV interview about his new movie. It begins well enough with her listing some of the awards it has received and suggesting a possible “Oscar nod.”

When asked what drew him to the project, he honestly reports that he wanted nothing to do with it. She asks “Did the explicit nature of the material scare him.”

     “At first, but by the end of the day it’s all part of the gig.”

     But it quickly turns personal when she suggests, “But I’m sure you knew that some people might speculate on a few things.”

     “Like what?”

     “Well, you identify as straight. But does any part of Mickey live within you?”

     “Well, Mickey’s also a drug addict and a prostitute. Why aren’t you asking me about one of those?”

      “That’s what happens to actors that play gay. Jake Gyllenhaal from Brokeback comes to mind.”

      “Can I ask you something?” Syd attempts to turn the tables. “Are you a lesbian?”

      The interviewer comes back, showing her ring for her marriage to man for two years.

      “Has being straight effected the quality of your work in any way?”

      “I get the point you’re trying to make. But you and I know that’s not the way it works. Especially in Hollywood.”

      “And why not? If I can make you believe I’m somebody else for two hours, then I’m doing my job.”

      She reminds him, however, that being a public figure is also a big part of his job. “You have 7 million Instagram followers, most of them young teenagers. They dissect your every action. You have a huge amount of influence with them.”

      Unable to bear any more of such scrutiny, Syd walks away, his agent reassuring him that the interviewer is dead meat. When the agent actually confronts the interviewer, she defends herself by declaring “Are you telling me that some scared, lonely, closeted kid couldn’t benefit from seeing a movie star come out on national TV?”

      The agent answers effectively: “You may be right, but that’s for him to decide. Not you.”

     Back with Syd, the agent suggests they grab their things and leave. But Syd asks when the press junket is scheduled, wondering how many times she thinks that same question will come up. “People are already saying things on line since the breakup. This is all I have. This is the only thing I’m good at.”

      “After this movie comes out,” she insists, “you will be refusing work. Forget about her, about all the millions of people watching. You’re being given an opportunity in there. You can either take or you can leave it.”

      A quick drink by our favorite Halifax bartender reveals via the bar TV screen that Syd has indeed “taken the opportunity” and returned to the interview.

      He begins with the idea that as kids we’re told being different is okay, that societal reassurance that someone will eventually see your difference and love you for it. And then you find the courage to admit that you are different. “But then you’re told that if you don’t change the thing that makes you different, no one will love you. So you change.”

       Asked what he’s actually saying, he literally comes out of national television: “What I’m saying is that I have spent the last 14 years pretending to be somebody who I’m not.”

       Some time later, we see a small café shop where the waiter rushes in, obviously late. He pours up an order for a medium latte, only to discover Syd Stone standing there to accept it. Syd goes over to his table, and the boy smiles.

       Later as he begins to clear up dishes on abandoned tables, he discovers that Syd is still there and dares to approach him, commenting on the TV interview he saw last month, having never seen anyone before come out on national TV, but praising him for his courage and suggesting he “handled it like a pro.” And suddenly, Syd is reminded that it’s that simple. He has suddenly made new friends and admirers around the world.

       I don’t think director Theriault could have taken this excellent short series much further, ending it just at the point when its hero finally becomes a full human being.

 

Los Angeles, March 30, 2024

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (March 2024).