Saturday, January 31, 2026

Manuel Kinzer and Jorge A. Trujillo Gill | Darío / 2018

darío the dancer

by Douglas Messerli

 

Manuel Kinzer and Jorge A. Trujillo Gill (screenwriters and directors) Darío / 2018 [15 minutes]

 

Darío, by Columbian directors Manuel Kinzer and Jorge A. Trujillo Gill really isn’t much of a movie when comes to plot. The 17-year-old boy, Darío (Javier Alberto Bula García) from Barranquilla (a seaport city flanked by the Magdalena River, known for its carnival festivities) simply loves to dance and is delighted to be an important part of the upcoming carnival activities.

    Yet his hard-working mother (Norelis Nieves Cardona) demands that, like his elder brother and she, he help support the family, insisting that each day he work at his uncle’s small food shop.

     Given the demands on the young boy of school, work, and dance, he arrives late to both work and his dance routines, and doesn’t return home until late, his mother furious that he has missed the evening meal. Even more important she is afraid of what his dancing might mean.

   While the others boys play soccer Darío practices his elaborate maneuvers with the other dancers, mostly female, watched carefully by another cute young boy (Jean Carlos Calderón), and to whom it is quite apparent that Darío is attracted.


    In short, her son is already what she is determined to he will not become, banning him from any further dance rehearsals.


    It is inevitable that Darío finally realizes that he needs to resist her demands; and when he doesn’t even show up to his uncle’s shop the mother grows furious. While attempting to reach him by cellphone, his brother notices that the carnival parade has begun and that Darío, dressed in an orange costume topped by a glorious orange headdress, she rushes from the store to the street where the parade is gathering, attempting to find and prevent her son from participating.


    She doesn’t find him in time, and when he finally goes strutting with his other dance members down the street, a wide smile of delight on his face, and glimmer of pride and love focused on the young boy who is watching and applauding his performance, all is too late. He has taken on his role, at least for the moment, of his young life, refusing to be shuffled off into the corner of poverty’s neglected children. For a moment, at least, he is a member of one of the ancient indigenous tribes (Muisca, Quimbaya, and Tairona) celebrating his existence.

 

Los Angeles, January 31, 2026

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (January 2026).

Friday, January 30, 2026

Ward Kamel | If I Die in America / 2024

the body thieves

by Douglas Messerli

 

Ward Kamel (screenwriter and director) If I Die in America / 2024 [15 minutes]

 

Syrian-born Ward Kamel’s 2024 short film If I Die in America once again recounts something that happens far too often in gay life.

    Both Manny (Gil Perez-Abraham) and his husband Sameer (George Shakkour) have evidently been in an automobile accident that has injured Manny and killed Sameer.


     Hardly as Manny recovered and attempted to visit the funeral home where is husband’s dead body lies that he is presented with papers by a cousin serving a lawyer for the family asking him to sign permission for them to ship the body back to Kuwait for a proper and immediately Muslim burial.

    Outraged that Sameer’s mother has not even bothered to talk to him about their request and for the fact that they do not even want to allow him time to assimilate the family request, he refuses.

     A short while later Dalal (Han Chamoun) tries again, this time visiting Manny at his home where a birthday cake for Sameer still sits on the table. Dalal is accompanied by another relative Khalil (Moud Sabra).

     Dalal apologizes, having presumed that the mother had spoken to him and for her having confronted Manny without warning. But she still reminds him that it is the Muslim custom to immediately bury the dead, and begs him to consent for the body to be returned to the family. She also argues that his flight will also be paid so that he might attend the ceremony.

     But again, Manny is not at all ready to make such a sudden decision, having not even had the time to assimilate his lover’s death. Khalil enters into the negotiations by claiming that Manny has no real say in the matter since he was not really married, their marriage having been only a green-card arrangement: “Are you a woman? Did you have a wedding? A real wedding, not just one with your friends. You didn’t because this was not a marriage. This was an arrangement. That’s all this was.”

   Manny lunges at him and tells them to get out. The homophobic statement, denying even the love they shared outrages Manny and he throws both of them out of the house, hurrying back by chauffeured car to the funeral home.


     Throughout he has attempted to call Sameer’s mother, but he receives only a recording; and he is told by Dalal that it is problematic to the mother to even have to acknowledge his existence. Furious by her refusal to answer his phone call, he throws his cellphone out the window. But soon after, he demands the driver stop and he attempts to find the phone in the field, finally speaking to the mother who attempts to explain that he is being selfish, that Sameer also had deep commitments with the family.

       In the last few moments of the film, it is clear that Manny has come to terms with the issue as we see him packing, dressed in black, obviously prepared for the voyage to Kuwait. He has come to realize that the burial will not alter the fact of their real love and time together.

      So often throughout gay history, lovers have been denied the right to even mourn their companions or, as the film A Single Man (2009) reminds us, robs the lover the possibility to even attend to funeral ceremony. In many cases before gay marriage was allowed, the houses of gay men, their possessions, and any remaining traces of their relationship were claimed by the families, particularly if their dead partners had made no will or other legal documents.

     Despite the truly homophobic situation, Manny finally comes to terms with the family claims because he is at least invited to the ceremony and he has the documents to prove his marriage and the significance of their lives together. More importantly, he has the memory of their love, as stronger force than any anger the family has had for their son’s sexuality.

     Yet this short film only reiterates just how tentative all gay relationships remain in a world of homophobic hatred.

 

Los Angeles, January 30, 2026

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (January 2026).

 

 

 

Sek Kei (Wong Chi-Keung) | 死結 (Dead Knot) / 1969

new growth

by Douglas Messerli

 

John Woo and Sek Kei (screenplay), Sek Kei (Wong Chi-Keung) (director) 死結 (Dead Knot) / 1969

 

In 1969, Hong Kong student John Woo and Wong Chi-keung, Wong being one of Hong Kong’s most well known and experienced film critics writing under the pseudonym of Sek Kei, wrote the screenplay to and directed an experimental film, Dead Knot. Although Woo came to be known for his generally all male martial arts and “bullet ballet” action films, in this early work we see him questioning and exploring sexual and gender differences in a manner that is clearly related to the US and other western European versions of the first coming out films (which I describe as version A) as represented by the early works of Kenneth Anger, Cutis Harrington, Gregory J. Markopoulos, Jacques Demy, and A. J. Rose, Jr., the latter of whose Penis (1965), almost a summary of the early “coming out” film tropes, is chronologically closest to Woo’s and Sek Kei’s film.*


    The 18-minute film, divided into eight short chapters—“the beginning,” “the place,” “the forbidden fruit,” “run away,” “the living,” “rainy season,” “lost,” and “dead knot”—recounts the experience of a young boy (John Woo) who is at first in thrall of a gay S&M lover (Chan Kai-Yat) before he escapes and attempts to enter in what he believes is a “normal” relationship with a woman (Cho Chung-Lang). That relationship, however, soon disintegrates into a daily fragmentation of their lives—expressed quite brilliant in their repetitive daily acts and the insistent cinematic break-up of the images with white fragments and cuts in continuity in “the living”— before things truly break down in “rainy season,” where the male actively attempts to escape the relationship, before their final breakdown in “lost,” symbolized by their placement of blindfolds over their eyes as they desperately attempt to find a way in darkness back to one another.


     In despair, the boy returns to the forbidden allure of his former male lover who now puts him into a “dead knot,” as he types out what is apparently the history of the story we are encountering—or, perhaps, another possibility for their future, since the “dead knot” can mean either the new growth from a tree that is only loosely connected to the original branch or a tied at the end of a rope to prevent it from passing through a hole or another knot used most commonly to join ropes in climbing. The dead knot, is short does not represent death or strangulation but ideas centered around climbing new roots.


     This short film, obviously influenced by the western filmmakers I mention above, begins with a male-on-male relationship, representing the suffering and torturing the confused gay-leaning individual must undergo through the S&M torture. Although there is clearly a long tradition of S&M behavior in Asian literature and filmmaking, it here my be simply symbolic as the narrow bed on which the individuals must suffer through their nights of doubt in the US versions of the coming out films.

    Later incidents in Dead Knot clearly parallel the US films about the same subject, including the demands of the woman as she is either carried up or runs up a long set of steps which the male attempts with an almost Herculean effort to follow her, a scene in this film that seems right out of Harrington’s short work Picnic. And other moments, such as the male’s awe of and attempt to comprehend the female body through a sculptural work, reminds one immediately of the male admiration the sculpted male body of Adam in Rose’s Penis.

    In short, this 1969 work almost seems to be the last example, as well as a nice summary of the gay coming out movies before young people discovered that you could actually come out to more than simply oneself and a delimited cinematic audience—but to family, friends, and society in general.

    As critic Tony Rayns described this short work in Time Out:

 

“Rescued by the Hong Kong Film Archive, this is the earliest surviving trace of John Woo's beginnings as an indie film-maker. A psycho-drama in the vein of Anger's Fireworks, it's divided into eight short chapters. A young man (Woo) tries to escape from a gay sado-masochist relationship into a 'normal' relationship - with a girl! - but ends up back where he started, unable to buck his deepest desires. Whatever light this may shed on Woo's later work, it's fascinating for teasing out the subtext from the perverse swordplay bloodbaths which Chang Cheh was making at the time (Golden Swallow, etc).”

 

    For a more detailed description of the music and sound production of this film, interested readers should read Li Cheuk-to’s essay “The Past and Present of Dead Knot, published in 2025 and available online on the internet.

      

*Although Woo heterosexually married in 1969 and has three children, it is nonetheless interesting that his major cinematic influences are films that are concerned with male bonding and homosocial if not always homosexual works. His favorite films, so he has reported, are David Lean’s Lawrence of Arabia, Akira Kurosawa’s Seven Samurai and Jean-Pierre Melville’s Le Samouraï—films with implicit homosexual and strong male bonding, along with other named favorites such as Michael Cocoyannis’ Zorba the Greek and Jacques Demy’s The Umbrellas of Cherbourg. Most of these works are discussed in the pages of My Queer Cinema.

 

Los Angeles, January 30, 2026

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (January 2026).

 

Thursday, January 29, 2026

Leon Lopez | Almost Saw the Sunshine / 2017

the difficulties

by Douglas Messerli

 

Leon Lopez (screenwriter and director) Almost Saw the Sunshine / 2017 [30 minutes]

 

British director Leon Lopez’s film begins with Rachel (Munroe Bergdorf) dressing for work in the morning, a seemingly self-confident young black transgender woman happy with herself after what he know must have been a series of difficult years. If nothing else she still has to cope, as we soon discover, with a drunken mother who has failed to do dishes for days, and whose beer cans litter a living room upon whose couch she lays sprawled.

     We see Rachel on the bus on her way to work, definitely being given a careful look over by a young man, Nathan (Craig Stein), Rachel self-consciously attempting to ignore his attempts to make his feelings about her clear.

      Working in accounting in what appears to be on-job training, Rachel arrives late yet again for work and is put on probation. But in the next scene the workday is over and she returns home to discover her mother Carol (Elizabeth Carling) has finally found her way into her bed; relieved Rachel carefully applies make-up for an evening at the local gay bar with friends. 



     On the way into the bar she again runs into Nathan, suggesting this time, half-jokingly, that it appears he’s stalking her. In their brief conversation she resists his attempts for a pickup, suggesting, when he asks whether she has a man or not, that “it’s difficult.” It appears that for transgendered women, that almost everything involves difficulties.

      The difficulty for a woman like Rachel is truly layered for many reasons. Does the young man truly recognize her as a transgender woman or does he see her simply as an attractive female? Despite his good looks, might he truly be “stalking” her? Males who hate “the idea of being fooled” often take out their own insecurities on transgender women. And finally, there is the problem of her mother, a white woman in this case (her missing father is obviously black) for whom she cares.      

     Yet when she shares the fact that she has met the handsome young man with her best friend Jody (IMMA) and her gay friends they cannot believe that she’s passed up on the chance of going home with him. A nightclub scene with plenty of booze, intense kissing, and dancing follows.        


    Leaving the club with Jody, Rachel again encounters Nathan, this time declaring that she now knows that he is stalking her. her friend quickly leaving so as to not interfere; when Nathan declares he knows what he wants, making it clear that he is aware of her being transgender, they end up in bed. But even here there are important warning signs, as he fucks her with his hand around her neck as ready at any moment to choke her to death. And she awakes confused, pleased for the encounter but troubled over his sexual behavior. She also realizes that she may be late for work once again!

     Rushing off, she makes it on time to work but is reprimanded for still wearing her evening club outfit, her boss suggesting she take the day off and think about her behavior. On her way home she once more encounters Nathan with a male friend (played by writer/director Lopez) taking a cigarette break, but as she passes on the street, trying to get his attention, he ignores her, clearly indicating that he can’t have her kind intermixing with his everyday reality, another expression of rejection she has probably experienced throughout her life.

     Returning home she encounters Carol, up for a change, but already drinking wine. But if we might have expected her to reprimand her mother, she instead breaks down in tears, crying in her mother’s arms. Darkness has once more descended on her moments of possible joy.

     Another discussion with her friend results in her observation, “I’m telling you, boys cannot handle girls like us.” Rachel declares that the only solution she can imagine is abstinence. Perceiving suddenly that Nathan is standing across the way, Jody suggests, “I think that we should probably just go, this way,” moving in the opposite direction from him.

     Back at home, she tries to prevent her mother from going out since she is drunk, but the woman argues and begins also to abuse her, suggesting she’s “just like the rest of them,” the “them” probably representing a broad range of her mother’s resentments, including her former son’s transformation. But she soon breaks down in tears, apologizing.

     Unable to control her mother any longer, however, Rachel seeks out her father who also won’t even recognize her in front of others, and standing on the street in front of his small grocery store claims there is nothing he can do for his her, he’s lost his son. Rachel tries to explain it is her mother who needs his help, but he refuses.

     Soon after, Nathan physically confronts Rachel near her home, demanding that she get together with him, stopped from further physical action by Rachel’s gay male friend who Nathan also threatens. We can almost see what is coming.

     But the dreams and events of life have a way of hiding the lurking horror. Rachel takes her accounting exam and when she retains home, her father George is waiting on the stoop, come to take her mother Carol on a ride. He even has come to a kind resolution to tell her daughter that she is indeed pretty. What they don’t see is Nathan, lurking outside.

     As her parents depart for a hopeful trip of resolution, Nathan shoves his way in, at first imagining that her father is the “someone” who she has declared she’s seeing.


      He rapes her, leaving her dead.

      The endnote to this film reads: 2,609 Trans people reported murdered Jan 2008-Sept 2017.

 

Los Angeles, June 21, 2022

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (June 2022).

Wednesday, January 28, 2026

Levan Akin | Geçiş (გადასვლა) (Crossing) / 2024

making connections

by Douglas Messerli

 

Levan Akin (screenwriter and director) Geçiş (გადასვლა) (Crossing) / 2024

 

After the relative success of his truly splendid 2019 film And Then We Danced about the near impossibility of being openly homosexual in the country of Georgia, Swedish director (of Georgian heritage) Levan Akin turned his attention to an even more fraught issue, being a transgender person within that same culture.

     The work begins in a rural community where a divisive family run by a fairly macho and unthinking brute married to a submissive woman who together dwell with the man’s younger and somewhat rebellious brother, Achi (Lucas Kankava) who mostly fights with his sibling and participates in quasi illegal activities such as running people back and forth between the nearby Turkish border with his brother’s rundown car.

     Suddenly a familiar face appears outside their hovel, Lia (Mzia Arabuli) the man’s high school history teacher, for whom he obviously still has great respect. She has come in search of any knowledge of a nearby encampment of trans women, one of them being her sister’s transgender son.

     Her former student denies any knowledge of them, except that one day they all packed up and left; but his brother, who later reveals that his elder sibling may have possibly visited the transgender prostitutes, suggests they moved across the border into Turkey with the destination of Istanbul. When Lia leaves the house, Achi runs after her, claiming to have an address to where she was headed. He also begs Lia to let him join in the search, so desperate is he to get out from the mean tutelage of his brother.

     Lia is a sceptic who, taking one look at the boy, realizes his presence will probably result in more problems than help. But he insists that he knows some English and perhaps even a few words of Turkish and will be a quiet guide for her.


    Lia, who has promised her sister to seek her child, now named Tekla, is certainly not at all thrilled about her mission, but she is determined nonetheless, and finally realizes that perhaps even an unreliable young guide like Achi might be helpful. She orders him to go home, pack up his belongings, and meet her early the next morning, but before she has even gotten halfway home, Achi appears again, this time in his brother’s stolen car, insisting that he will drive her home and then on to the border where they will catch a train to Istanbul.

     Again with some reluctance she agrees to his suggestion, and so begins an “on the road” adventure with the seemingly authoritarian yet committed Lia and the unreliable but highly likeable Achi, undertaking a voyage to a city even more wondrous and confusing than Oz on a search for what neither of them are afraid they might find. In Georgia trans people are almost nonexistent, only occasionally do you hear a story about a father who accidently killed his son while cleaning his rifle. Transgender individuals almost always slip across the border and disappear forever in order to survive.

     Achi, as we might suspect, has lied. The address he claims was Tekla’s destination was in fact a location for trans prostitutes he got off the internet, none of the prostitutes having ever heard of a Tekla. He knows not a word of Turkish and his English is sketchy at best.

     Fortunately, Lia has come prepared with at least a day or two of basic provisions and enough money to get them a few nights in a tawdry hostel with a shared bathroom in the hall. Neither of them has a clue where to look or who to even contact.

     Yet somehow, despite the fact that Achi one night takes off and gets drunk at a party to which he is invited to by two girls on the street, resulting in Lia’s ousting him from her room, these to lost lambs bond and, amazingly, find fortune is on their side.


    Actually, Akin’s tale is a marvel of almost Dickensian coincidence, as we follow  Lia and Achi, two street children—one of whom plays an instrument and who together beg for their daily meals by offering up their services, including at on point guiding Lia and Achi to the trans prostitute house—and a transgender woman Evrim (Deniz  Dumanlı) who works of a LGBTQ help center—at one point freeing the street boy from jail and eventually helping Lia find a brothel where, at one point Tekla worked, leaving behind some of her possessions.


     With a camera that seems as busy and crooked as Istanbul’s cat-ridden streets, we observe how our central characters keep crisscrossing paths with the others, along the way allowing us to get to know the children and Evrim, the latter of whom finally gets a degree from the University of Istanbul which allows her to become a legal assistant while also falling in love with an unlicensed taxi driver (Ziya Sudancikmaz). Evrim’s encounters with the two children, moreover, reveal her importance to the lives of Istanbul’s vast population of outsiders, and her abilities to help track down Tekla’s previous whereabouts, demonstrates her savvy and endless patience. If there is any figure in this film that helps to open up narrow minds previously skeptical about transgender individuals, it is this remarkable figure, and it is Evrim, in part, who utterly changes Lia from a dour determinist to a loving human being.

     Yet, we experience all of the figures as being on the cusp of remarkable changes. Throughout the film, Achi spends a great deal of time just eating, suggesting that he perhaps he has never before been given enough to whet his appetite, but also hinting at his absolute hunger for life.

     For Lia, the experiences she newly witnesses are almost all gathered in the corners of her eyes. She silently observes it all, unable to communicate in Turkish, for the first time in her life, perhaps, becoming the student rather than the teacher. And we see her grow almost moment by moment as we observe her taking in new visual, aural, and tactile experiences she has never before quite imagined.


    We also are witnesses to several other encounters that Lia and Achi have in the city that help to change and heal both them. At a restaurant the duo meet up with a friendly business man, formerly a Georgian, who properly wines and dines them as Lia, hoping in part that he will help them but also somewhat charmed by his attentions, for the first time reveals a whole new aspect of her personality, rising to dance a traditional Georgian folk piece and, darting into a bathroom, for the first time putting lipstick to her lips. By the time she returns the businessman has run off, perhaps as Achi argues, having scared him off in her sudden transformation, but utterly charming us and Achi, who admits he now sees how she was once a beautiful young woman. Later, when Evrim takes them to a restaurant, mostly closed because of a wedding party celebration, she once more is asked to dance, this time by Achi, Evrim eventually joining in, as we suddenly realize that our now beloved characters have been thoroughly embraced by the heterosexual wedding party.

     By film’s end Achi determines to stay on, having found work at the hostel, while Lia begins the long trip home alone. But suddenly in a kind of transcendent moment of imagination discovers Tekla on the Istanbul streets, the two recognizing each other, and demonstrating their delight in finally seeing one another again. Early in the film, Achi has challenged the older teacher by asking her what she intends to say to Tekla once she finds her; Lia had no answer.

     Now, she fully invokes a wisdom that she might never been able to express before meeting up with the many transgendered prostitutes and having the opportunity to encounter Evrim: “I would tell her that we failed her. Her mother and I. We did nothing for her. We lost so much time. We only cared about what people would say about us. That’s what I would tell her. Despite of everything, I would tell her that I love her too.”

     Despite all the miracles of discovery people make in this film, Lia has not miraculous discovered her niece. But she has come to discover the language of love for when that time comes. And she now determines that she too will stay in Istanbul and keep looking, that she will not abandon her responsibility for loving as she has in the past. Perhaps she will even, once again, hook up with Achi. The two of them, after all, have made a pretty powerful if failed approximation of detectives, a rather absurd version of Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson. Yet somehow, in this city that links Europe to Asia, they make the necessary connections to bring love and meaning back into their lives.

     Finally, this is a film that must be experienced; there is no proper way to describe it. What happens is all expressed in faces of the central characters, a raised eyebrow, a stare of amazement, a slight smile. By film’s end, not only the fiction’s characters but the audience themselves have made the significant crossing over that people like Tekla and Evrim had been forced to make, a recognition that perhaps what we know of learn of ourselves from the outside is not really who we are within.

     Levin never preaches; he demonstrates, confabulates, imagines connections that might never have otherwise existed. And in the end, were too learn, forgive, and accept.

     This film received the Teddy Award from the Berlin International Film Festival.

 

Los Angeles, January 28, 2026

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (January 2026).

Tuesday, January 27, 2026

Fernando Lopez | Novena / 2022

prayers for a lost soul

by Douglas Messerli

 

Fernando Lopez (screenwriter and director) Novena / 2022 [16 minutes]

 

Manuel (Jonathan De La Torre), his sister Carina (Kriss Dozal), and others are sharing one of the nine days in memorial and prayer for the loss of their mother when Eddy (Joseph Mercado) knocks on the door apologizing for not having been able to make it earlier in the week.

     Although Manuel sends a slightly glowering look at Eddy as they sit on the couch to continue their prayers, when they finish he grabs Eddy’s hand, thanking him for coming. Eddy declares that his mother always treated her as one of her own and could not imagine not paying his respects.


     Given that the house is darkly lit for the funereal Novena, most of director Fernando Lopez’s film is very murky, both in its images and story, and we must feel our way around the edges of this work to comprehend the relationship and past events between the two protagonists. What is already clear is there are some bad feelings between the two men.

     We quickly learn that Eddy’s stay is brief since he announces to Carina that he flies out tomorrow morning. When Eddy finally joins Manuel in his bedroom to talk, he asks after Hector, apparently Manuel’s brother, who he’s told has still about 2 ½ years left, presumably of a prison sentence.

      When Manuel offers Eddy a slug of beer, Eddy asks if he has something stronger, his friend pulling out a pint of liquor. There’s obviously some resentment, Manuel responding that it looks as if Eddy has done pretty good for himself these days. What his friend had once declared he wanted, he evidently now has, Manuel conjectures; but as Eddy himself admits, he has had “to leave a lot a shit behind.” One wonders whether his relationship with Manuel was part of that “shit.”


       Evidently, Eddy has been away for a long time, years in fact, hating to have to return only at such a sad moment.

     In that moment Manuel turns on him, arguing that he is not like Eddy, the friend retaliating by asking if he’s like his brother then—clearly a reference to his imprisonment—which leads Manuel to his violent response, demanding he say nothing further about his brother. Eddy admits that he barely recognizes his former friend, Manuel retaliating, “What did you expect? I’m not going to let you suck my dick if that’s what you came for!”

        At last, we know something of their former relationship, perhaps the reason why Eddy hung around Manuel’s home and family long ago. And we know that the long time Eddy has been away has led to a deep resentment and now rejection by the man who might have been Eddy’s former lover.

       Eddy clearly has no choice but to leave. Yet Manuel is also clearly sorry to see him go, and as Eddy leaves the house calls out him to ask where he staying. Eddy admits that he hasn’t figured it out.

       The situation changes almost immediately, as Manuel offers him a ride that ends in the parking lot of a local motel. Suggesting that his friend might want to listen to some old CDs he has in his glove compartment, Eddy pulls out what is clearly a collation of long-ago favorites of theirs; “I soundtracked all our bad choices,” confesses Manuel. And the mellow jazz sounds of “Tres Boletos” brings smiles to their faces and obviously memories of their past times.

       By the time they reach the motel lot, Manuel is ready to apologize and admit that he’s proud of what Eddy has done. But Eddy recognizes his reasons for that resentment. Manuel must now take over the role of family leader, and both recognize without either speaking if that it means that for him there is no escape to the world where Eddy has evidently gone.


      Eddy reaches out to help to relax his buddy’s tension, Manuel sighing heavily several times, perhaps, in part, just to feel Eddy’s touch after all these years. Before long, the two are embracing, Manuel almost breaking down into tears.

       Soon after they’re kissing. After a break in the film’s image and moment a quietude, the screen opens on what is clearly the next morning, the two having spent the night together in the car. Manuel zips up his jeans and Eddy rebuttons his shirt.

       Eddy opens the car door and exits, leaning into the open window to say “I’ll try to come around more often,” Manuel shaking his head while answering, “Yeah.”

       Manuel drives off, stopping at another point beside an old couch someone has tossed away. He simply sits in place, on the verge of tears, looking ever so often to the now empty seat from where his lover has just had sex with him. He hugs his coat close, finally breaking it to tears, knowing that there can never a time “more often,” that it is over between them.

       The prayers of the Novena were not just for his mother, but his soul as well.

       This film was featured in a collation of short film in NewFest 2023.

 

Los Angeles, October 16, 2023

Reprinted from World Cinema Review (October 2023).

My Queer Cinema Index [with former World Cinema Review titles]

https://myqueercinema.blogspot.com/2023/12/former-index-to-world-cinema-review.html Films discussed (listed alphabetically by director) [For...