Greg Wolf | The Venmo Vanisher / 2023

the casa amigo mystery

by Douglas Messerli

 

Greg Wolf (screenwriter and director) The Venmo Vanisher / 2023 [10 minutes]

 

This short work bills itself as “a Los Angeles mockumentary”—with an inordinate, campy sense of hysteria, I might add.

    Greg is invited by friends for brunch, and all goes well, each of them telling their usual meaningless bitchy tales and sharing endless discussions of work. Meanwhile, a new member to their group, Loine, a handsome blond, begins to flirt with Greg. When it comes time to pay the bill each of them proceeds to throw their credit cards on the table, but Loine claims to have forgotten his wallet; might Greg just cover him and he’ll pay him back immediately on Venmo? Moreover, he orders up another drink, Casa Amigo, the others quickly joining him—on Greg’s credit card, of course.

    In fact, Loine does meet up with Greg soon after for fabulous sex, but no Venmo money arrives in his account. Now almost in tears the actor playing Greg reports that the next week there was still no Venmo. He calls and texts, but there is still no answer from Loine.

    A few days later he invites the boys over to celebrate one of their, Toby’s, birthday. But Loine does not show up with them. Even Patrick, the other friend, suggests Greg stop trying to collect. The two agree that Loine is just “flaky,” that he missed someone’s wedding just to attend Lance Bass’ pool party.

    In the style of the mockumentary, Greg argues that then “something really strange happened.” When he attempts to call Loine, he finds the number has been “disconnected.” We are entering the territory of a serious criminal offense in the story now, since Greg is still out $200, and clearly he cannot afford it.

    The film flips back to the “real” Greg (all the film’s characters, we are told, are played on the screen by “hot paid actors”), who now reports: “And that’s when I knew something bigger was going on.”

     Greg calls up Loine’s female friend Maggie, and discovers that Loine has also ordered up “Casa Amigo” drinks with shaved ice several times on her card as well, and similarly, he never paid. They do, so Greg reports, what any sane person would do. They begin to stake out Loine’s place where they discover something really “weird”: dust on the doorknob!

     Greg calls the police, reporting a case where there are now several victims and a missing person; but inevitably the cop scoffs at his desperation.

     Our distressed hero decides to take it back to its source, visiting Loine’s mother, who tells the tale of her good boy taking her out for Mother’s Day, he promising to pick up the check. But before paying, he goes to the bathroom and “he never came back.”

    Greg begins posting pictures of the missing criminal who appears to still be collecting more victims. “Make it make sense. I’m telling you, things just keep getting weirder and weirder,” he bemoans the situation.

    A man brushes up against him in the street, dropping a piece of paper inviting him to join him in an alley to learn about Loine.

  Greg shows up, explaining that he has now been looking for Loine for two years, but the hooded confidant will not reveal his identity: “It’s safter if you don’t know.” “Know what?” Greg cries out.

    At that very instant a burlap bag is thrown over our hero’s head, as he realizes he was set up to be kidnapped. They punched him and shouted “Quit searching for Loine, or otherwise next we won’t be so easy on you.”

     Greg thinks maybe he should stop, that he’s getting in over his head. But he simply can’t, he claims. He wants his money, and besides Loine is clearly on a rampage. Patrick suggests it isn’t safe anymore, that he needs help, Greg arguing, “No, what I need is my 200 dollars!”

     Returning home with groceries the next day, he suddenly observes Loine jogging. “So I did what any obsessed, exhausted, unhinged person would do.” He drops the groceries and goes chasing after Loine. But when he catches up with jogger, it isn’t at all Loine, just a runner with long blond bangs, a bit like the way Loine used to look. But Greg, now almost mad, insists he’s going to find Loine, repeating it over and over again.

    An end note reads: “Greg never found Loine. No longer being able to afford Los Angeles, he was forced to leave his friends and career behind and move to a small Wisconsin town. He lives a quiet life with his two dogs, Schnitzel and Falafel.”

     After seeing this short film, I have now determined to discover why director Greg Wolf made this movie other than an intent to satirize just how out of touch with reality gay drama queens really are. I promise you to make it devote the rest of my life to getting to the bottom of this.

 

Los Angeles, September 2, 2025

Reprinted from My Queer Cinema blog (September 2025).