by Douglas
Messerli
Jake Jonez
(composer and performer), Jake Jonez and Emily Erdelyan
(directors) Touchdown / 2025 [3.47 minutes] [music video]
Actor and comedian
Jake Jonez, famed for his video series with Jonez and Aaron Goldenberg, Mean
Gays Invite You Over for Some Fun,” issues the music video Touchdown.
If you just heard the lyrics you might
imagine that it was the product of some hyperventilated high school sports star
singing to all the girls of his school. But Jonez, as you may already know, is
most definitely gay, and as the visual elements of this video make clear, the quarter
back in this game is speaking to all the boys, in particular to one of his team
mates when he sings lyrics such as these below
Jonez comes strutting out with his backup
chorus, hips swaying with homosexual lust; he kisses his locker mate, and lays
him down right on the field. It’s pretty clear where this is going, and if his
boyfriend ever tries to go back to girls, Jonez will come swinging for him with
a baseball bat, knowing only too well,
“I'm sexy, I'm
cute, I'm popular to boot
I'm wanted, I'm
hot, I'm everything you're not
I'm bitchin',
great hair, the boys all love to stare
Who am I? Just
guess
Guys wanna touch
my”
“Go tell your mom
about me, you know I'm sticking around
I know you play
the field, but I'm your touchdown
Baby, can't you
see? You'll miss this, you're out of bounds
I know you play
the field, but I'm your touchdown”
…
“(Night two) You
fucked me in the back seat of your car
Flip this dime, I
want your body on top of mine”
…
“I know ya told
Amber that you loved her in May
But baby, it's
October, and the leaves are all grey
If your dad found
out, we know he'd be pissed
But nothing ever
felt this good on your lips”
“Down, down, down,
down, down, down, I'm your touchdown
(I'm your
touchdown, yeah, I'm your touchdown, I'm your touchdown
Yeah, I'm your
touchdown
I'm your
touchdown)”
“I'm sexy, I'm
cute, I'm popular to boot
I'm wanted, I'm
hot, I'm everything you're not
I'm bitchin',
great hair, the boys all love to stare
Who am I? Just
guess
Guys wanna touch
my (I'm your touchdown)”
Los Angeles,
September 10, 2025
Reprinted from My
Queer Cinema blog (September 2025).
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